Will 7pm find it's feet?

The 7pm Project is becoming a rather frustrating 30 minutes. There is so much potential there for a really entertaining, not-so-serious look at news events - yet every night they run well short of the mark.

Firstly, Carrie reads the serious news items with a smirk on her face that suggests she might burst out laughing any second. Unfortunately her work on Rove is what she's most well known for, so it's difficult to take her seriously.

The 'state roundup' where the panel crosses to correspondents around Australia is very hit and miss - some of the correspondents are hilarious, others are cringe-worthy beyond belief (Hans from Perth is particularly bad).

In fact, it seems generally on the show that everyone chosen to comment or be interviewed has been slipped a valium before going to air - the Paxton-esque unemployed girl, the young woman and her mother reunited with their dog, the fat girl who's boyfriend dumped her ... need I go on?

Then there's the other end of the stick with commentators being overly opinionated. Examples include the parking infringement officer (who made a completely out of line sexual advance at the young Ruby Rose) and ex swim coach Laurie Lawrence - both of whom were raving lunatics given too much rope.

The reason for this? The panelists aren't very good at interviewing - they're asking closed questions (questions that can be answered with yes or no) and are having to ride the awkward silence when the guests respond with one word.

Dave Hughes also has a knack of answering the question in the question, eg. "So you're pretty happy to have you're dog back, aren't you?" - it doesn't exactly call for a detailed response with expressions of heartfelt emotions does it?

Then again, Dave Hughes isn't a journalist so he can be excused, however Carrie doesn't get off so easily. I don't know what Charlie Pickering is or does (besides pontificate with an elitist air of self-satisfaction) and Ruby Rose shouldn't be on the show at all.

James Matheison is still the saving grace of the piece. Tonight he made what would have otherwise been an absolute fizzer (the reunion of the shy teenager with her clearly sedated dog) into a funny little piece.

I'm still holding out hope for it but there are so many bleedingly obvious things that could make the 7pm Project better - pre-recorded interviews for example, or maybe just having a chat beforehand to ascertain whether the people you're putting to air are actually interesting?

- Oh, and ditch the Skype 'voice of the people' bit - there's a reason some people don't have a voice.

2Day FM - what price?

The Kyle and Jackie O breakfast show this morning hooked a 14-year-old girl up to a lie detector test and let her mother ask her questions about school, drugs and sex. The girl admitted on air (in some of the most excruciating radio ever heard) that she had been raped at the age of 12. Whilst Kyle's idiotic response was "Right ... And is that the only experience you have had?", Jackie O did try to save face with the offer of counseling and by quickly pulling the plug on the segment.

The segment can be heard here (without names).

Commercial radio is well known for its 'do anything, try anything' approach to win the ratings - Judith Lucy wrote an excellent article a few years ago for The Age about her short stint on Today FM in Sydney and the ludicrous ideas thrown around for competitions and segments;

The idea was 'celebrity sperm' and the concept was that you would get a celebrity to donate their sperm (the example they used was Guy Sebastian, because we all know how much self-proclaimed virgins like chucking their semen around), and the woman who won the competition would get to impregnate herself. I am not making this up.

The thing is, this child is not being properly cared for by her parent/guardian. Her mother stated on air that the girl had not received counseling and that the mother herself only became aware of the 'incident' a few months ago - this also insinuates that the alleged rape had not been reported and that there has so far been no follow up.

What kind of mother signs a disclaimer to hook her daughter up to a lie detector and talk about sex and drugs on the radio? What kind of radio station pays money - and surely there was money involved - to a woman of clearly low intelligence who has an obvious dysfunctional relationship with her child to basically fight with her daughter on air?

It all comes down to the issue of popular culture and the lower classes. The only people (besides self-obsessed egomaniacs) willing to lose their dignity on television or radio are low income earners or people who can't fully understand the consequences of their actions. Look at Big Brother - the house was basically full of bogans and half-wits, the people we see on Today Tonight and A Current Affair are always from low socio-economic areas - and therefore more willing to 'sell their story' for a quick buck.

So here we have a bogan mother selling her 14-year-old daughter to a commercial station to be humiliated on the airwaves. Do we expect much more?

The station (including Kyle and Jackie O) is at fault - under no circumstances should a minor have been put on air to talk about participating in illegal behaviour (drugs and underage drinking/sex). The mother is a complete f#cking idiot - but ultimately the fault lies with the station who should know better.

On the issue of the alleged rape and the child not being properly cared for - DOCS can figure that one out.


* Thanks to Jess McGuire at Defamer for a great post about the incident.

Unruly Liberal

Part two of SBS documentary series Liberal Rule will air tonight at 8:30pm.

Last weeks episode "Cycles of Power" was brilliant. It is inevitably being compared to the ABC's documentary The Howard Years, after the ABC withdrew SBS access to its archives (preferring to keep the archival material for its own project).

Creators of Liberal Rule, Nick Torrens and Frank Haines have said that the reneging on the agreement to access archival material has resulted in Liberal Rule being a much tighter, well-packaged piece than it might have been - and it is certainly well worth watching.

Comparatively though, I don't think any political documentary could beat the introduction of The Howard Years - it's quite simply some of the smartest editing you'll see - it encapsulates in less than one minute the relationship between Howard and Costello;

I remember seeing this for the first time and nearly jumping out of my chair at the sheer brilliance of it. It is certainly worthy of a fist-in-the-air and I'm not sure anything I've seen on Liberal Rule has come close to it.

Stupid Person Poll

Last week's Chaser's War on Everything ended with the web poll question;

Who's the most idiotic person channel 9 has ever paid money to?
a) backpacker jamie neale
b) richard wilkins
c) sam newman
d) eddie mcguire
e) karl stefanovic ... etc, etc, all the way to x,y and z.

However there was an omission on the list of Chk-Chk-Boom-Bogan, Claire Werbeloff who channel 9 has not only paid before but is set to put on the pay-role again as the host of a show called "Scammers".

It sounds like your basic A Current Affair, Today Tonight brand of shite where so-called "scams" are uncovered for the benefit of those unfortunates in society who think taking out a double mortgage on the house and transferring their life savings to a Nigerian bank account is a good idea.

Again, channel 9 deserves a pat on the back for helping the intellectually disabled - and putting them on the pay-role.

Budget to Hire Better Actors?

You might remember the pain and trauma of this Budget Direct advertisement - it featured the worst French accent in the history of the universe;

Well just when you thought it was safe to watch commercial television (and for the record, as long as there is a pending Aus. Idol series it is NEVER safe) - Budget Direct come out with another ad featuring the same bad actor with the same bad accent. In the new one she pronounces "Google" as goo-gally ... I know, hold on to your ribs people.

I don't know why these ads bother me so much - especially considering there are SO MANY bad ads out there. The fake accent is just too much, surely there is ONE actor in Australia that actually has - or can fake - a convincing French accent.

Seemingly not within the advertising Budget.

Melbourne MIFF'ed

The Melbourne International Film Festival opens tonight with the screening of the Robert Connolly film Balibo starring Anthony LaPaglia and Oscar Isaac.

The news today is reporting fears that the film might stir controversy as it tells the story of six Australian journalists killed during Indonesia's 1975 invasion of East Timor. The Indonesian and Australian governments view is that the journalists were killed in cross-fire but the film portrays the journo's as having been murdered.

AFI award winning director Robert Connolly spoke about the importance of the film earlier this week on the Triple R breakfast show - you can stream the podcast here.

Double Burp for Channel 7

Well, both Double Take and TV Burp on channel 7 last night were pretty terrible. There were a few clever moments in Double Take (few and far between that is) and I will give Ed Kavalee the benefit of the doubt because he was so great on Triple M's Get This (with Tony Martin), but really, I'm not sure either of the shows will be well loved.

There have been a few negative comments on forums about the swearing and nudity on Double Take - of course the rebuttals have pointed out that Underbelly was aired at 8:30pm on channel 9 and contained a lot more violence and nudity. The thing is though, Double Take is a comedy sketch show - not a serious drama - and the promos for it have been generally tame, as opposed to Underbelly, which was clearly not going to be family viewing for the kiddles.

In any case, nudity and swearing are the mark of a desperate comic - it's only smart comedy that can make us laugh without resorting to a dirty joke.

Mind you, I barely noticed the swearing - I was too busy watching the clock - counting down the minutes until it ended. TV Burp wasn't as painful, but certainly wasn't quality entertainment.

Not Excusing the TV Burp

Speaking of brain-ache format-television, channel 7 has amped up the promos of its new show TV Burp - starting tomorrow at 9pm. It's hosted by Ed Kavalee and is based on the UK's Harry Hill's TV Burp.

There's a short preview of the Aussie version here. Basically it looks like Funniest Home Videos but using clips from various TV shows. I'm not filled with enthusiasm after having a look at the British version;

Of course any program including the description of the release of gas from the digestive tract in its title is sure to be quality entertainment.

Couples Crapola

Australia's Perfect Couple is the latest reality drawl on channel 9.

Let's check some reality TV boxes shall we?

Extroverted money grabbers wanting their 15 minutes of fame? tick
Stupid physical tasks that involve personal harm? tick
Attractive people willing to wear next to nothing and spend lots of time near a pool? tick
Ethnic - but not too ethnic* - element? tick
Morally bankrupt people willing to walk over their mother to win a buck? tick
Botox-injected host secretly delighting in the contestant's pain and suffering? tick
Gay element? tick
Underlying racism, homophobia and general ignorance bubbling all too close to the surface? tick

Basically, it's another bullshit reality show - after 20 minutes I'd already had more than enough.

* "ethnic elements" in reality shows are usually tanned - but not too tanned - second or third generation south-east European people. The inclusion of an Indian couple in this series is a logical move considering a lot of British reality TV has the token Indian contestant and a lot of Australian programming is purchased from the UK. This particular Indian couple are of course not too tanned and certainly don't have accents - god forbid!

7pm Verdict

I thought I'd wait til at least night 2 to cast judgement on channel 10's news/talks program The 7pm Project. Overall I think it's good. Dave Hughes and Carrie Bickmore have a comfortable rapport and Charlie Pickering is quick-witted and generally charming - unfortunately he made a comment last night that irked me; when discussing a pair of gay penguins, he referred to one of the male penguins developing a relationship with a female penguin rather than a male as "how things should be". Considering that gay rights are being fought tooth and nail at the moment this sort of ignorance bothers me intensely. Since then, he's getting on my nerves a little bit - what can you do?

Ruby Rose is awkward and punching above her weight - but she might grow into the role. And last but not least; James Matheison - he is the dark horse in this ensemble cast - he's funny, sarcastic, naughty but nice and oh so likeable. Night one he was in studio and was being left high and dry by the rest of the panel - but tonight he really shone on location with Masterchef winner Julie - he was cracking jokes with the family and working well under pressure. I look forward to seeing him develop outside the scripted host format of Australian Idol.

Overall the show's not amazing, but then it's not altogether terrible either. I'm interested to see where it goes and how the cast develop as a team. It's night one ratings were good (of course it remains to be seen if viewers come back for more) and I'm generally happy with any program that takes viewers away from that vaccuous abyss that is Two and a Half Men.

Who's Checking?

The 6pm channel 7 news reported about 20 minutes ago that there was 'breaking news' of another bomb blast in Jakarta. Then 10 minutes later it was reported as a hoax.

Who is checking the information that goes to air? I know Richard Wilkins isn't exactly a journalist so not much is expected of him in the way of accurate information (I am of course referring to his reporting of Jeff Goldblum's death before Jeff Goldblum knew about it) - but the 6 o'clock news can surely be expected to have some credibility?

The fact is that television and print news are scared. The production of these takes time and the ability to report breaking news is limited. Clearly it results in jumping the gun and putting to air any old thing in an attempt to be the first to break the news.

Unfortunately it results in misinformation.

Cooking up a Storm in a Teacup

The Masterchef finale is the talk of the town today as the popular program attracted 3.7 million viewers last night in the official ratings results. I'm not sure that it was entirely a shock to anyone, after all, it's been one of the most popular shows on TV since about week 4 of the series. Not to mention the fact that the weekly evictions have made the front page of most papers on a regular basis.

Besides, look at its esteemed colleagues in the three-point-something million club; two Australian Idol finales and The Block finale. The only other programs that get a look in are sports events. Mind you, I'm not about to go on an elitist rant about how Australian viewers should be more discerning in their program choices ... because I too watched the Masterchef finale (whilst multi-tasking several other activities - after all, I can't devote a whole 2 hours to one program!)

I came in at the end, to what I thought was the video of the speeches at my cousin's 21st - it was very friendly wasn't it? Judge Gary Mehigan fighting back proud tears was almost too much to bear. Some critics have suggested that in these "times of financial instability" family viewing is on the up and up - Talkin' 'Bout Your Generation being a prime (time) example. And who better to personify the image of homeliness and comfort than the chubby home-cooking specialist Julie?

It is certainly a much better program than the other reality drawl - Dancing with the Stars and Australia's Got Talent; where the stars aren't even B grade anymore and the only talent is the production team that manage to edit this crap into an hour around all the replays, recaps and suspenseful commercial break outro banter.

Channel 10 execs will be hoping the 7pm Project (starting tonight at, you guessed it, 7pm) can ride the wave of Masterchef's success, with winner Julie being a guest on tonight's debut show. And of course Australian Idol will be back on our screens next month.

Meanwhile, it looks like the finale show next year will be live to air after all the trauma the pre-record has caused the media ... particularly the Daily Telegraph. Check out Andrew Dodd's post on Crikey here.

One more thing ...

Prediction: there's going to be a celebrity version of Masterchef taping from September - If I were a betting gal (which I certainly am not) I'd put money on Vince Colosimo (even though he's currently contracted to channel 9) and maybe Pete Hellier being involved.

100th POST!!

This is the
100th Screamedia post

... which I thought needed some fireworks.

So here is one of the greatest moments in Australian broadcast history; the lighting of the Sydney 2000 Olympic torch by Cathy Freeman. This was aired on channel 7 on Friday the 15th of September 2000;

*be sure to pay particular attention around the 3 minute mark when the mechanism jolts and the cauldron is stuck for about 4 minutes before the computer glitch was overridden and it was able to glide up the ramp.

And while I'm talking about HUGE moments in Australian TV, here's the most famous TV wedding of all time ... (well, besides Prince Charles and Princess Diana of course);


On a serious note (tissues at the ready) thanks so much for reading and commenting - I hope you've found something to amuse or enlighten you.

- If not, stick with it, I promise I'll come good!

Australian Idol

Let's face it, Australian Idol is seen as a bit of a joke among serious musicians. The fact that it's not so much a singing contest as an exercise in marketing doesn't build its street cred amongst independent artists. And promos like this certainly aren't helping the cause any;

Is it just me or is this ad the ultimate in tacky commercialism? It's making me preemptively hate them all when in order to watch the series (which of course I will) I'm going to need to like at least one of them. Basically Aus Idol is as tacky and crass as the pop-tarts it wants its contestants to emulate (and why we secretly love it and them).

But then it goes and gives us Lisa Mitchell - a unique, young artist who's music is not at all the norm and who we would otherwise not have heard about were it not for the show. She's not pop, and she's not easily marketable - but she is testament to the fact that young artists can indeed use the sap-wagon that is Aus Idol to get a break.

One 'serious' artist who has been very vocal about the fact that Australian Idol is a joke is Kate Miller-Heidke. The classically trained Brisbane artist has had some nasty things to say about the show - which is why I found the fact that her song "The Last Day on Earth" is currently being used for a Neighbours promo a bit odd.

After all, Neighbours is where ex-idols go to die (anyone remember Daniel O'Connor or Dean Geyer?) and someone who thinks Aus Idol is a talentless exercise in consumerism surely wouldn't want their wares flogging a channel 10 soap that is equally scorned for its tackiness?

I wonder what a channel 10 promo is worth these days?

Hey Hey it's a Slow News Day

A young friend of mine joined a Facebook group last week titled "Bring back Hey Hey it's Saturday" and I thought; I'll leave the gorgeous dear alone, after all, she's 16 and couldn't possibly know the pain and trauma an act like that might reckon on the world.

Cut to this morning when another friend sent me a link to this article - and I can be silent no more!

Hey Hey it's Saturday was an evening variety show featuring comedy, music and celeb interviews. Here's an idea: replace Rove McManus with Daryl Somers, Dave Hughes with Dicky Knee and Pete Hellier with Ozzie Ostrich. Put Ryan Shelton in a duck suit and have him throw raw chickens at the audience and you've pretty much hit the nail on the head. The "Red Faces" segment is basically Australia's Got Talent (including Red Symons) and you can "spin and win" on Mornings with Kerri-Anne.

Hey Hey it's Saturday did showcase Australian music talent ... as does Rockwiz ... and it did give young comedians a chance to strut their stuff ... as does Thank God You're Here ...

So we've got it all covered, ok?! No need to bring Daryl back. I think comment 70 summed it up;
Where's the "Bring back Enough Rope" Facebook group or the "Give Brian Nankervis his own Show" Facebook group? Surely these are more worthy causes.

The whole 'group' and 'fan' thing on Facebook is altogether annoying. It distresses me that the article is suggesting the people who join these Facebook groups are actually conscientious supporters of whatever the stupid thing is that they're clicking on. Most people would have joined the Hey Hey group as a laugh - if we locked them in a room for four hours and made them watch reruns I think the outcome would most likely involve a violent rampage, horse tranquilizers and damaged property.

And another thing ...

If the article is about the power of social media, why didn't the author elaborate on the mention of the campaign to bring back the "chips"? Could it be because it wasn't Facebook - it was that old-fashioned medium of radio that succeeded in the reintroduction of the savoury snack Toobs. Hamish and Andy had a segment on their drive time show on Fox where they asked people what product they would like to see return - there was an overwhelming response about Toobs - so they helped lobby Smiths Snackfood Company and Toobs were reintroduced to supermarket shelves.

It seems bored consumers had the power to lobby organisations and make change before the wonders of Facebook.

Shocking, but true.

Better Blipping Songlist

Melbourne's Triple R breakfast host Fee B-Squared was yesterday slaving away at music sharing website BLIP.fm compiling an ab fab list of 101 female artists (in no particular order).

One can assume that the inspiration was not ONE female artist having graced the numbers of that other list.

Here is Fee's blip page.

Pure brilliance.

Internet Censorship

This is a brilliant anti-censorship advertisement made for GetUp! by Adelaide ad agency Fnuky:

So totally like, random.

While I'm on the topic of gratuitous use of animals (see last post), channel 9's Random Acts of Kindness has put a Woodend animal shelter in hot water after renovations on the property didn't comply with Department of Primary Industry guidelines. Supposedly the programmers were advised of the guidelines, yet didn't comply with them.

Mind you, the proprietor Trish Burke did point out that the shelter was already in breach of guidelines relating to staff training and proper management of waste water - but she insists that the programs renovations are primarily what has alerted the DPI to the breaches. Hmmm.

It seems she was well aware that while she was enjoying her 'surprise trip' that the shelter was undergoing renovations. And she was obviously well aware that the shelter would be a focus of the program and eventually be aired on television - thus bringing it to the attention of the DPI in any case, including any breaches of the guidelines that were already happening.

So who has the duty of care to liaise with the DPI to ensure any renovations carried out meet guidelines? It seems the RAK producers wanted some sweet little fluffy kittens in soft-focus (sure to pull the audience heartstrings) but didn't worry about the technicalities. And it seems that the proprietor wanted a weekend away and a free renovation but didn't want to worry about the details.

The unfortunate thing is that the shelter might be closed. The animals are the ones paying the price - and they weren't even asked to sign the channel 9 waiver (although I wouldn't put it past the producers).

Perhaps RAK will in future be more mindful of the effects of their 'randomness'.

Sam Neil's self respect: he was meant to eat it.

The latest ad from MLA (Meat and Livestock Australia) feature Sam Neil and an orang-utan named Dennis.

Is Sam Neil really so desperate for work that he has to do this. And why does Dennis the orang-utan seem to have shaved arms - is it so his carers can find a vein easier for the sedatives?

Is an orang-utan red meat? Perhaps the next installment in this series will feature Mr Neil chowing down on an orangu-burger ... after all, its got iron, zinc, amino acids and omega 3 ...

So many questions, and I'm not even vegetarian.

Lukewarm 100

The Triple J Hottest 100 of All Time ended today with the top song being Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit.

Whilst many of the songs in the list are brilliant, they are all very commercial - and would all be heard on Triple M or Fox - many on high rotation. I wasn't expecting much better to be honest, considering Triple J has moved far far away from the alternative, smash-the-system, down-with-mainstream ideals it had when the youth station was conceived.

Glaring omissions:
Sonic Youth, The Who, The Velvet Underground, The Triffids, The Go-Betweens, Iggy Pop, Jesus and Mary Chain, The Church, The Jam, The Cruel Sea and James (who's 1993 album Laid is in my opinion one of the greatest of all time).

Laughable inclusions:
System Of A Down - Chop Suey! and Tool - Forty Six & 2. The call was for the best songs EVER not songs you like to wank over.

Muse - Knights Of Cydonia might be a technically exceptional song but top 20 of ALL TIME? Methinks not. Same goes for Hilltop Hoods.

Overkill factor:
Jeff Buckley. Yes, he was amazing, yes, it was a shame he died ... but four songs, two of them in the top 10 is just mental. Same goes for Radiohead.

I'm pretty sure it's not because I'm getting older that the list amazes me - clearly there are people over 30 voting or Metallica, Guns'n'Roses and Led Zeppelin wouldn't have got a look in.

The list is basically disappointing. WAY too much cock-rock. It's hopefully a lesson to Triple J that their audience has shifted well and truly away from what was originally intended and that they may need to re-assess the music they're putting out there.

There has been talk over the last few years that Triple J in its current form is no longer relevant ... I would suggest that the results of this countdown might prove that to be true. If a commercial station were to do a Top 100 of All Time I think it would be almost identical.

In a RUSH

The preview for the new series of channel 10's Rush looks amazing:


I must admit I never watched series 1, I'm not really a fan of crime drama and the programming was always chopping and changing. It seems though that 10 is putting a bit more faith in series 2, with the addition of Jolene Anderson (formerly of channel 7's All Saints) and what looks like a whole lot of action and stunt work.

I'll be watching this season. (Episode one was available on the Ten website in its entirety from the 3rd of July but has since disappeared.)

Rush returns 8:30pm Thursday July 16 on channel 10.

Pete & Myf Over

Well the axe has landed and the Pete and Myf breakfast show on Triple M is officially boned. Word has it that Eddie McGuire and Shane Crawford are a few of the names being looked at for the breakfast timeslot. Triple M head of content Guy Dobson has said that the breakfast show will be moving in a different direction - something "aligned with the Triple M brand" - which is clearly a few more footy anecdotes and a few less brain cells.

Ferguson Out

Only days after the launch of channel 9's THIS Afternoon, newsreader Mark Ferguson announced he will be moving to channel 7. Seven CEO David Lecke took the opportunity to have a swipe at Nine;

“Although we are not announcing his job description just yet, I know we can offer him something far more challenging and exciting than THIS Afternoon.”

Ferguson has been with Nine for over 17 years - rumour has it that he will be reading weekend news on Seven.

THIS Afternoon has not had good reviews - I managed to catch the first 20 minutes or so on Friday but found myself changing the channel because the content was so slow and dry. There was an awful lot of awkward banter between the hosts as well which makes for uncomfortable viewing.

All Saints Boned

The future of channel 7's All Saints has been in question for a while now after falling ratings. This season was cut from 40 episodes to 22 earlier in the year after the expensive 're-invention' of the show did little to help viewer interest.

Official word from 7 is that the 2010 series hasn't been decided on but it's not looking good for the long running drama.

Let's hope the brilliant John Howard (Dr Frank Campion) stays on our screens in another role - he is a great Australian talent and it would be a shame not to see him on screen.

Blind Talent

Reality program Dancing with the Stars started this evening on channel 7 with its supposed "world exclusive" of a blind contestant.

The incessant publicity relating to contestant Gerrard Gosens' disability has been mildly offensive to me, let alone people who actually live with disabilities and try to lead normal lives without people gawking and patronising. The fact that host Daniel MacPherson made reference to the upcoming performance before every ad break wasn't nearly as cringe-worthy as the fact that they got some kid from Australia's Got Talent (cross promotion anyone?) to sing "You Raise me Up" before the paralympians dance routine as the show finale.

Hello? Anyone seen Scent of a Woman? or how about the classic 1986 made-for-tv-movie Can You Feel Me Dancing? starring Justine Bateman? I don't know much about Gerrard Gosens, but if he's an amazing person it's in spite of his disability - not because of it - which is what the show seems to be using as a publicity booster.

Not that I was expecting anything classy from this abomination-of-all-things-holy of a program. I can only really comment on what I saw between channel flicking - which was Today Tonight host Matt White (cross promotion anyone?) leering at his partner in a way that only a 17 year old virgin let into a Playboy mansion orgy could do - before grabbing her breasts and trying to break her back over his knee ... twice. I didn't think I could hate Matt White any more than I did before tonight but his (high rating might I add) performance made me cross my legs and want to scrub myself with Solvol soap until my skin was gone.

The only other performance I saw was swimsuit model (ie. men's magazine model) Emily Scott. The producers must really be clutching at straws for celebs when they're flicking through porn magazines and thinking "I wonder if this woman will do anything for media exposure?" ... answer; yes. I don't know how they didn't think of it sooner - if anyone is willing to make themselves look like an idiot for a quick buck it's the 'adult magazine' model. Next year they could get sponsorship from Picture magazine and call the show "Dancing with the Home Girls".

Let's see - what else was there? Oh yes, judge Mark Wilson's hairpiece - surely the costume department could have spent all the money saved on making the female costumes entirely of just string and sequins into getting a better stuffed animal to cover his receeding hairline?

Did I mention I hated the show? I won't be wasting another second on it.

News Ltd Pulling the Hartigan Strings

JOHN Hartigan, chairman and chief executive of News Limited, today addressed the National Press Club on the future of journalism.
Besides giving a pat on the back to News Ltd's own opinion website The Punch, (which he stated as being something completely new - but which is basically a blog) he tore bloggers apart;

(on Blogging) "We pretty much get what we’ve paid for - something of such limited intellectual value as to be barely discernible from massive ignorance".

I'm not saying that all blogging is intellectual or well researched or even readable, but he interestingly chose to single out one particular site (which I assume is Crikey) with the following attack;

"As Robert Thomsen of The Wall Street Journal says: 'The blogs and comment sites are basically editorial echo chambers rather than centres of creation. And their cynicism about so-called traditional media is only matched by their opportunism in exploiting it.'
One of the best known comment sites in Australia matches this identikit.
It started as a moralising soapbox; boasting about its lack of standards. Positioned as an underdog, it lectures mainstream media every day."

In my opinion, the greatest potential in citizen media is its ability to hold the mainstream media accountable. Where the media has traditionally been the 'voice of the people' (whether we like it or not) the growth in citizen media has shown the institutions of the world that we can speak for ourselves - thank you very much.

The majority of citizen media might not be worth any attention - but how much mainstream media is worthwhile? Sifting through the "Man Gets Penis Stuck in Vacuum Cleaner" and "Why Men want to Marry Women with Large Breasts" articles is a task I no longer have to undertake thanks to personalised news pages and twitter feeds.

Citizen media is mostly crap - but so are long speeches by people wanting to flog their wares and give hope to their distressed minions.

- But what would I know? I'm just a blogger.